Kali and potty training

You know those moments in life when you judge someone because there kid does...or doesn't do...well unfortunately I've been that Mom.  When Anna got potty trained it was easy.  Okay so I had to try a couple times but the 2nd time she got it in like 3 days no problem.  So I just thought every other kid should be like that.  Boy was I wrong.  Now there is Kali.  I love this kid to death but after a WHOLE ENTIRE year of trying to get this kid to go in the potty I've hit a wall.  I tried being positive, giving her an M&M or small marshmallow every time she went, I even tried cold showers cause people I know swore by them.  But you see NONE of it has worked.  This kid will be 4 Sunday and I'm done!  So if you see my kid in a pull-up then just know that yes I'm that Mom who lets her 4 year old wear a pull-up but not for the lack of trying.  We are going to see a urologist in about a month, but until then I would like to have a positive relationship with my daughter instead of fighting about going to the bathroom.  Besides that I feel like I've ruined her ability to have a positive potty experience.  It is always a fight and she wets herself at least 3 times everyday and then the times she does make it in the potty she has peed a little in her panties first so she stinks.  I guess you could say as a Mom that is the hardest part, I don't want to going around smelling like pee all the time.  Kali is such a fun and loving kid that I need to remember that when I'm so frustrated about the situation.  The past year has been rough with her because I've been so consumed by this.  So why do I let myself?  Well it's embarrassing.  I feel like the worst Mom ever but for now I'm trying to let it go.  She may have to wear a pull-up for the rest of her life but hopefully I can love her through it, cause really that is what matters. 

So in everything you go through in life there is a reason and you learn something right.  Well I would definitely say that I have learned that MOST people are dealing with some type of a battle whether with a child, themselves, or someone they love and I'm doing my best to just be a support and not judge.  I just hope that others will see that I'm doing the best I can to be the very best Mother I can be and well my child still has agency.  Also I wish that I was perfect but I'm not and I just hope that I can learn what I need to and that Kali can know that I love her even though she isn't perfect.  She loves so completely and she is willing to be anyone's friend.  She also smart, creative, and super coordinated.  She loves life so much and she is always telling stories she made up, or playing Mom and Dad, or Claire and Talie(her cousins).  Kali doesn't have to be the center of attention but she loves it when I take time just for her.  She truly is a special girl and I'm so blessed that she was born into our family.